welcome to feather spirit!

Hurray! After a busy day of more-work-than-I-thought and struggling with coding and arranging and then a huge internet failure, Feather Spirit is here! It's still a work in progress, but I hope you enjoy how it's progressed so far.

My intention for this space is for it to feel more like home to me, a virtual sanctuary I can settle into, and that you can feel at peace here, too. As I've been dreaming this up and planning it and creating it, this is how I've imagined and visualized it:

 photo via apartment therapy

Full of pillows and soft blankets and morning sunlight and plants and lavender and snuggly cats :)

I'm sure my posts will mostly be the same, but I love that it feels like I have more of a focus, now. I'm excited to delve more deeply into more creativity, soul, nature, and self-care. As a welcoming party for Feather Spirit, I've asked a few gracious bloggers to join me here this week, so look for their guest posts coming up soon.

Thank you so much for joining me here. If you'd like to leave a comment introducing yourself or sharing your thoughts or just saying hello, that would be totally welcome :) I'm looking forward to sharing this space with you.

Be well,
Ruth

re-learning to blog and a blog relaunch

It seems I've forgotten how to blog properly, how to put one word behind another and string them along to share what's going on in my world. I've no idea how to start, what to say, how to decide on a topic or an idea or at least some semblance of coherence. I even find myself looking at others' posts, wondering How did this person start this post? and That seems like a normal way of beginning a sentence, yes. 

Ridiculous, I know. And yet I'm trying to send myself some compassion in this, some understanding for this epidemic that is comparing-yourself-to-other-people's-work-to-try-and-feel-better-but-inevitably-feeling-worse.

My solution so far has been to stop blogging. My archives have slowly been dwindling down, to some times when I go days and weeks without posting. (I'm sure you've noticed.) I've chalked it up to my natural flow and rhythm, knowing that posting every day for the sake of getting a post up isn't why I blog.

But I have realized that I'm putting too much pressure on myself about this whole blogging business. I worry about what to say and who will read it and what they'll think and how I'll sound. Sound familiar? It's a very comfortable place for me to hang out in, this self-doubt. I've also realized, with a start, that : I'm not really interested in coming to this virtual space, anymore. Ruth Writes doesn't inspire me, it doesn't light me up, it doesn't make me want to put thoughts into words to share with you all. And if I don't want to come here, why should anyone else?

So that's when I decided it. Ruth Writes was no longer serving me. But I did want to keep blogging. After all, there was a time when I loved blogging. And writing. And sharing photos. This current space just wasn't the place to do that, anymore.

Hence, a blog relaunch! Starting on Monday, Ruth Writes is getting a facelift. Actually, probably more like a total body makeover. With a new name, a new design, a new energy, and a new vision. It's not going in a totally new direction, but rather I'll be more focused on the subjects that really interest me, and use them to drive my posts. I'm envisioning a virtual sanctuary, where I feel comfortable hanging out and sharing my truths and being honest, and I'm hoping you will, too.


Have a lovely weekend xx


PS
Despite my radio silence here, I'm guesting today at Manic Mrs. Stone. Hop over and take a look!

sacred sunday

How Would You Live Then?

What if a hundred rose-breasted grosbeaks
blew in circles around your head?  What if
the mockingbird came into the house with you and
became your advisor?  What if
the bees filled your walls with honey and all
you needed to do was ask them and they would fill
the bowl?  What if the brook slid downhill just
past your bedroom window so you could listen
to its slow prayers as you fell asleep?  What if
the stars began to shout their names, or to run
this way and that way above the clouds?  What if
you painted a picture of a tree, and the leaves
began to rustle, and a bird cheerful sang
from its painted branches?  What if you suddenly saw
that the silver of water was brighter than the silver
of money?  What if you finally saw
that the sunflowers, turning toward the sun all day
and every day -- who knows  how, but they do it -- were
more precious, more meaningful than gold?

--

Mary Oliver

dusk walk.

Trying to remember my vow to myself : to move my body for at least five minutes, every single day.

Yesterday, it was last minute, at dusk, in the last hour of sunlight, and only around the yard.

But it was movement, and that's what matters.

in my life...

...I've been learning and practicing big lessons, more and more. Movement! The wheels have been turning for some time, and yet they're just beginning to turn enough to create movement.



I'm planning a big blog relaunch, to go live April 9th. I've loved this space in the three years since I started blogging, but it doesn't feel like an easy, college, get-your-thoughts-out-onto-the-screen outlet anymore. Instead, I want to transform it into a sacred online sanctuary. I want it to feel hopeful and magical and beautiful, and I want you to feel that, too. Ruth Writes doesn't serve me in that way, anymore. So on with the new.

(And, secret: this new website will actually be the completion of my very last project in the Creative Goddess e-course. Which I started in August! But the very last project in the course is a big one, and it's just been taking me some time. And! If you're thinking of trying the course or joining the Goddess Circle, a new group starts the Creative course together in the Circle on April 1st, this Sunday. This is one of Leonie's most popular courses, and I can totally vouch for that. Join, join! See my post on the Circle here.)



I'm contemplating a bigger blog post about this coming soon, but Maebel update: After a lot of thinking and mulling and grieving and battling and crying, I decided that Maebel needed a new home. I couldn't give her what she needed, and she couldn't give me what I needed (or rather, what I expected to get). I came really close to handing her off to a stranger who could care for her, but in the end, my parents decided they'd keep her. So, she's still around and growing like a weed, but she's not my sole responsibility now. So far, it's working out perfectly. Not even four months old yet and tripled in weight!



I'm planning to explore acupuncture and herbs and naturopathic medicine for a variety of reasons soon (I already am, actually). Anyone have any experience here? I've dabbled in the herbs and alternative doctors before, but never acupuncture -- I'm a little nervous! I've been thinking about trying it for months now, and now I feel like it's time to make it happen. I love hearing others' stories, so if you have any, share in the comments!



Carmella and I were talking recently about a topic that I can't stop thinking about lately: being and owning and embracing the person you've become. Compared to who I was in high school, or in college, or even just a year or two ago, I've done so much changing and growing and transforming that I wouldn't even recognize myself. We decided that sometimes that can make us look like we're living fake lives or trying to be people we're not, but -- it's the exact opposite, really. It can be scary to try new things and develop new interests and live life in a very different way, but to us -- it's the only way to live. So we're embracing our new selves. Yes.

just thought you'd like to know what my anthem is this week.

This is one of those songs I instantly become addicted to, and begrudgingly wait for the day when I'll get sick of it and won't want to listen to it anymore,

but then that day never comes. :)


Maybe it has something to do with men with beards who make music? Probably not.
But maybe.

grateful for:

: heart-shaped doggy heads

: mailboxes that read "ABUNDANT LIFE" in sparkly, glittery letters

: 60-degree weather in March

: making connections in the Goddess Circle

: guest post opportunities

: ridiculously silly Skype conversations with Jana (sorry, dearest)

: eating honeydew melon, kiwi, and mango for dessert (and pretending it's summer)


Let's all revel in great big waves of gratitude! :)

moving along.

The days are growing longer.

The light is staying later, now.

I'm growing fuller, stronger, wiser, truer.

I feel myself being topped off, filled up again with my wisdom: listening to my body and my Wise Woman, following my intuition's sweet-scented trails, moving slower and more deliberately, accepting only absolute truth and richness into my life, devouring the healthiest blogs and books and sounds.

Usually, the beginning of a new menstrual cycle for me is a challenging time. I often find myself fatigued, upset, triggered, sensitive, disconnected. I usually feel angered by this, mad that my body could be betraying me in this way, mad that a whole week out of every four is spent wasted.

This month though, I feel different. I feel the same fatigue and upset and triggering and sensitivity and disconnectedness, and yet.....it feels.....easier. Ease-ier. Like a natural rhythm of sorts, like this is just how my body wants to be right now. And the ease-iest solution?

Listen to it. Get into pajamas at 3pm if I want. Make 8:30pm my declared bedtime. Only do the bare minimum to get through every day. Drown myself in water and tea. Move even slower. Give myself permission. Eat what foods feel good to me. Make Project Period my first priority.

Perhaps it's the arrival of spring here in New England. It may not last, but the sunny weather and warm temperatures and open windows and general optimism in the air is enough to soak up and hold onto as a talisman of our future, not far off, coming whether we believe it possible or not. Perhaps my body senses this, and senses that the hardest of winter has past, and is feeling warmer and more optimistic, too.


Here's hoping new seasons and daylight and changes are greeting you in your part of the world, too.
:)

wild geese, rising moon

"The world offers itself to your imagination,

calls to you like the wild geese, 

harsh and exciting --
over and over 

announcing your place
in the family of things."

 _____

 Mary Oliver

(This poem is just so bloggable, I suppose :)

bits of life.

Here,

wandering, musing, finding, being.

Distinguishing between fear of letting go, and fear of space and freedom.


Tomorrow starts the first day of less daycare hours and more writing hours. I've been waiting so long to cut back on the amount of time I spend in that classroom, and tomorrow is the start of it being cut by ten hours per week -- I'm going from about 35 to only 25. (Eee! Ten hours less! This feels monumental.) By doing so, I'm able to accept more freelance writing, resulting in less hours worked and more money earned.

When the moment is right, it can feel like the whole Universe is opened up to you :)