Friday, December 31, 2010

my year

blustery

I'm ending this last morning of 2010 in pajamas and new slippers with a mug of coffee in hand and (probably the last of the) holiday music playing and the view of my partially-decorated Christmas tree out the window, at an hour when I usually would have been at work already, for quite some time. It's leisurely and slow-paced and I like it.

2010 was a tough year. There have been moments so low I never thought them possible. I've been working hard to clear out space in my life, perhaps harder than I've ever worked on anything in my life. I've made big changes and awoken to new possibilities and gotten clearer about what I want out of life. I've had to shift my priorities and discover what feels true and cope with my surroundings in a different way so as to hear my own heart.

In a word, I've been refocusing.

And now that I'm slowly making all this new space in my mind and my soul and my heart, I'm beginning to feel ready to let new things in. Things that will meet my new requirements, that will feel true to me, that will serve me. They will probably not be the things I've accumulated between 1987 and 2010. They will be new and tingly and scary and bursting with life.

And I think in 2011 I'll get that much closer.

It's about time.

2 comments:

  1. ruth, my dear friend, i completely understand.
    i'm right here with you, and what an exciting journey 2011 is going to be!!
    i agree 1987-2010... i feel like i've gathered up a lot of different information in the past 23 years, (and this is so cheesy) but i feel like 2011 is sort of birth into a new and conscious life, with deliberate and honest decisions.

    happy new year!!

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