blogging frustrations

I was just about to post a very brilliant post.

It felt authentic and true and everything I've been meaning for the post to say and then,

I unplugged my computer without turning it off * and lost the entire Notepad document** in which I had typed these words-from-the-heart.

Gone, just like that. Notepad offers no "recovery" tool.

I almost cried. For I haven't felt the urge to blog in weeks and have been tossing around these ideas for posts in my head and in my journal and I finally sit down for 30 minutes and the words just tumble and flow effortlessly out of my mind and onto the screen and then

they're gone.

I've tried sitting again and conjuring the images and energies and words again but to no avail. They will not come out again, but just inspire frustration and tears.

But perhaps they're still stewing, and still need time to grow.

I think I'd like to get them out soon, and take this blog by storm.....




*My laptop battery has decided to peter out (that, or the charger doesn't charge--one or the other) so my computer shuts down with the merest wiggle of the charger cable, so when I want to move my computer to a different room, I need to shut the whole thing down and unplug it and start it back up again once I'm plugged in where I want to be and well--I get lazy and just yank the cord out without shutting anything down and start it up again and it's still good as new (my Firefox window restores all the tabs).  So, lesson learned.

**I like to type out my posts stream-of-consciousness-style in a Notepad document, and then copy and paste it into my Blogger window. It always feels so much better that way.