Tuesday, May 18, 2010

a dry erase marker and a mirror

In college, during my senior year, my roommates and I moved into an apartment. We spoiled ourselves silly, those two semesters. Maybe we didn't buy food as often as is deemed healthy and appropriate, and maybe we didn't participate in expensive campus goings-on at the time, and maybe we stayed within a 10-mile radius of campus so as not to waste gas, but boy, did we have it made in that apartment.

We each had our own bedrooms, with these big-sliding-mirrored-closet-doors that were just fantastic. Now that I'm living at home again and I have to run into my sister's now-vacant bedroom every time I want to look into a full-length mirror, I'm pining for those mirrored doors.

Early that year, Stephanie had taken to doodling and writing little notes to us with markers on our mirrors to read when we'd wake up in the morning. She always made me smile with her notes. She'd written on her own closet mirror, too, decorating it and writing little notes to herself, even.

This girl is wise beyond her years.

One day I walked into her room to find a little reminder to herself scrawled on her mirror-door, right next to her bed.

You are a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved, it read.

At first I giggled. Of course you are. We all are.

But then I thought about it. Do we all know that? Really know that? Maybe that's why I was giggling--because I didn't truly believe it.


Stephanie's little love note to herself stuck with me. Every time I entered her room, I read it. Sometimes it would just pop into my head without me realizing it. I had it memorized. It became like a pattern in my brain.

At home now, I have it written on my mirror above my dresser. It says I am a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved.

I am a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved.

I am a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved.

I am a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved.

It's on my desktop notepad on my computer screen too, and scribbled here and there throughout my planner. It comes as second nature now.


A few weeks ago, my aunt and little cousin were over for dinner. Later that night, I walked into my room to find eight-year-old Katie standing in front of my dresser, staring at the mirror. "I am a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved? What's that?"

But she wasn't giggling. She was intrigued. Her expression was completely serious. She really wanted to know why it was there and what it meant.

I explained the purpose of affirmations to her and why I liked that particular sentence. I could see her thinking about it, deciding if she thought I was crazy or funny or maybe even smart. She began to read it slowly.

"I am a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved. I am a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved. I am a strong, beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be loved! I AM A STRONG, BEAUTIFUL, INTELLIGENT WOMAN WHO DESERVES TO BE LOVED!" Her face could hardly contain her wonderment.

Then she ran to tell her mom her revelation. And my heart almost melted.



So, thanks Steph. I'm glad we had that overly-expensive apartment, and those unnecessarily-huge mirrored closet doors, and your wit about yourself to even think of doing something so extraordinary. A dry erase marker, and a mirror. That's all it took.

14 comments:

  1. That Stephanie is quite the girl.

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  2. I needed this post today more then youll ever know! This is going on my bedroom mirror pronto!

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  3. This just broke my heart in all the best ways. Oh yes. Ohhhh yes.

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  4. this post brought a wide smile to my face. we don't affirm ourselves nearly enough. it's so easy to see the things we think are fabulous about others....but in our own selves!

    thanks for sharing this story.

    ps: the basil from your collection of weekend pictures looks amazing!! so do those garments drying in the sunlight :)

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  5. WOW, this post really inspired me. Thank you!

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  6. This was a powerful post.

    I liked it and it is funny the chain of events and how people get affected. I am sure that stephanie didnt think that affirmation would affect anyone else but now look at all the women it has touched.

    beautiful

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  7. So inspiring! So much so, in fact, that I've shared your blog with my blog readers. Take a look:
    http://lovely-silver-strands.blogspot.com
    And thanks for sharing such an uplifting thought.

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  8. This warms my heart.
    By my desk I have a reminder in children's magnets on a dry erase board: "Love yourself first." Life isn't about being selfish, I know, but you are the only one you've got until the end, you've got to take care of yourself.

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  9. That is such a wonderful daily reminder, I think we all forget and need these affirmations. I really love your blog, I'm a new follower ♥

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  10. What an inspiration. With all that is in the media these days we all must truly remember how beautiful and intelligent we are! I love your blog and have started following!

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  11. aw this is awesome!!!
    i love that note!
    i just might have to write it down and stick it on my mirror!!
    such an inspiration!

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  12. I can't remember if you said you'd read it yet, but this reminds me of something in The Help. You should read it, if you haven't, and then we should discuss how wonderful life is :)

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